Confession is good for the soul

I have a freak left armpit. My right armpit knows exactly when to perspire: 1) when it's hot and 2) when I exert myself. My left pit, however, does not seem to be governed by such rules. No, the left pit has gone rogue. It sweats whenever it wants, regardless of the inappropriateness of such an act.

I can be sitting perfectly still in a well air-conditioned room, for example, and all of the sudden, with no provocation, my left under arm decides to make a scene. The right arm and I pretend not to notice, going about our business, forbidding left arm to participate in any gesturing activity. All I can do is wait for left pit's little act of defiance to pass. And it always does. But not without leaving evidence.

There, now you know.